Making office life gorgeous Change One Thing
With life/work coaching expert Curly Martin.
Is your office life gorgeous? We have teamed up with life/work coaching expert Curly Martin to show you how — if you change just one thing, and continue with the change you can build a gorgeous office life for yourself.
We live in a great country with unlimited opportunities, resources and expertise. As usual, the start of this year has prompted all sorts of resolutions, both personal and professional. Sticking to them is difficult, particularly when everyone in your world is hosting another set of resolutions with a completely different time-frame.
This year can be different; use the Change One Thing Plan and make a promise to yourself that you are going to take action to turn your own office life into a gorgeous life, this year! Do it with us and Curly will show you how to do it by concentrating on an area a month and turning one easy change into a habit that will take you to a gorgeous life.
Curly has identified the top 12 areas that people would like to change, and since your professional life reflects your personal life (and vice versa), we will be working on all of them during this year. You can have a gorgeous office life if you are prepared to focus on just one change each month, and we will support each month with tips and hints that will make the journey a gorgeous one.
Gorgeous year topics
How will it work? Each month you will select one area from the recommended list and take action every day on that area. The following month you will select another area from the new category (February — office relationships) and also, continue with the one from the previous month’s list (January — Health) or select a new one from the previous month’s list. As the months go by you will be adding a new action to the list of actions that you already do each day. Easy! The gorgeous you is just around the corner.
December — Your dream goals
Make your next year gorgeous, you need to set your goals this month for the year ahead. You have now worked through a whole year of simple ideas, thoughts, tips, activities to make your life gorgeous on a monthly basis and you should now be in great shape for putting plans together for a gorgeous 2009.
Simply start again and follow the pattern for the months ahead. How will this work as I have already done it this year? Well last year you were starting from a different place. So when you revisit this coming year you will find different things to do and discover about your gorgeous self. Go ahead and grow your gorgeousness.
If you however, do not know how to set goals or maybe you have set goals before but not achieved them? The answer to this is to hire a life coach and I have many life coaches for you to chose from on the website. Working with a life coach will help you to set gorgeous goals and start to live your gorgeous life.
You will know if you need to find a life coach by the results you have achieved this year. If you only read the articles and did not take any action you need a life coach! It really is that simple.
Ask a hundred people what they want in life, above everything else, and most people will give you a list of things that they don’t want! That at least is a starting point because each of these negatives can be turned into its positive equivalent. For example, ‘I don’t want to work in an office’ could become, ‘I do want to work outdoors in the open air.’
We can return to the fun aspects of goal setting in a little while. First I invite you to give some serious thought to the next question. It may take you a while to come up with your answer and that is fine as it is vitally important that you do answer.
If I could be, do or have, anything in my life, with no risk of failure, no limits and no responsibility for the outcomes…What would it be?
Please read that question again slowly and carefully because every word is important. Beware of negative thoughts creeping in as you consider your answer. This is a question with no restrictions where anything can be possible.
Activity
Now find a piece of paper and pen and write down your answer to the question. ‘If I could be, do or have, anything in my life, with no risk of failure, no limits and no responsibility for the outcomes…, What would it be?’
Read your answer out loud. Did you feel gorgeous when you read it?
Great, so now you know what you want you need to make a plan on how you are going to get it and by when you will have it! Small actions to take you to your long term gorgeous goal!
If you really want to change your life you can find out more about these power interview techniques by buying our personal success programme Download to Destiny — career programme contact me to find out how!
National Office Week along with Making Office Life gorgeous campaign will provide you with the tools you need to make the difference — you simply have to make the choice.
November — Your charity
Make your life truly gorgeous, you will feel gorgeous and radiate gorgeousness and people will want to be near you. We have looked at gorgeous spirituality and now we are going to look at a practical way to achieve this. If you develop the feelings of gratitude in your life you will increase your gorgeousness in exact proportions! The more you give the more gorgeous you will become.
Give gorgeously and freely
It has sometimes been suggested and I am sure that you will have heard that an obsession with money is simply a slippery slope to selfishness. Sometimes this can be the case, but it can equally be a wonderful opportunity for selflessness.
If your gorgeous success releases some of your gorgeous time, you can choose give your gorgeous extra time to others less fortunate than you. If gorgeous success for you, creates wealth, then you can share this too.
I am NOT advocating that you give out of a sense of duty, that you give with strings attached, that you boost your ego by massive ‘charity’ donations or that you give without direction. If you do this you will not experience the gorgeousness of giving.
Here are 5 simple rules you can use when giving gorgeously:
- Give with no expectation of any personal return or gain
- Give anonymously and privately
- Give to the sources of your help and inspiration
- Give thanks daily for all the things you do have
- Give within your means
Rule 3 above can do with a little expanding. If, like me, you have had a close encounter with cancer, then your gorgeous giving could be towards a cancer research charity. My husband enjoys messing about in boats, so the Royal National Lifeboat Institution would be an appropriate recipient for him. If you gained spiritual inspiration and support from a synagogue, church, mosque or new age commune, then give gorgeously back to a synagogue, church, mosque or new age commune. If you gained time for your success because you had a child minder or nursery, then give gorgeously to a children’s’ organisation.
Get the picture? Give appropriately and you will feel gorgeous. The amount is up to you of course, but a typical gorgeous tithe usually is understood to be around 10% because this amount should not steal from your feelings of gorgeousness and compromise your needs for clothing, shelter and food but is significant gorgeous giving to make a difference elsewhere. Why not consider 10% of the additional time, money or other resources that your success has delivered. Another benefit is that 10% is dead easy to calculate for the mathematically challenged.
Karma means that what goes around comes around. The first Christians were told, ‘as you give, so shall you receive’. Which is a neat place to bring this month to a close with a final reminder…
Gorgeousness is not measured in materialistic terms.
If you really want to change your life you can find out more about these power interview techniques by buying our personal success programme Download to Destiny — career programme contact me to find out how!
National Office Week along with Making Office Life gorgeous campaign will provide you with the tools you need to make the difference — you simply have to make the choice.
October — Your spiritual growth
Make your spiritual life gorgeous, you will feel gorgeous and radiate gorgeousness and people will want to be near you. Just because you work everyday it is not an excuse to avoid looking at your spatiality. I am sure you have met someone who radiated a gorgeous self assurance and charisma? That is because they have developed their own spirituality.
This month is all about the spiritual growth.
This is about you discovering what gorgeous spirituality means to you and how you define it. Before we can proceed, we need to clarify things and avoid you confusing religion with spirituality. Many people who are happy with their spirituality have no religion at all and many others, who follow a religion, can struggle with their spirituality. You will need to discover your purpose which you can do by downloading my Download to Destiny programmes. You can start your spiritual growth by asking yourself these questions.
Gorgeous Spirituality
- What do I think of when I consider the word ‘spirituality’?
- What does being spiritual mean to me?
- How do I know this?
- Define spiritually as it is for you.
There are many different interpretations of gorgeous spirituality. Unlike material, worldly or earthly where most objects are tangible and visible, gorgeous spirituality is invisible, powerful and is a totally personal experience. Here I invite you to consider spirituality as a connection to something ‘greater’ than yourself. This may include an emotional state or a religious reverence. It can relate to psychological health and it often focuses on personal experience, as it does in some religions.
Gorgeous spirituality can involve perceiving life as having more important, more integrated or more complex dimensions than the usual ‘busyness’ of the daily business. You will come across terms like ‘higher being’ or ‘enlightened state’ especially as contrasted with the merely sensual, physical state.
You have spiritual success when you achieve inner peace. If you do not have inner peace you will not feel gorgeous spiritually. So decide what it means to you today.
If you really want to change your life you can find out more about these power techniques by buying our personal success programmes Download to Destiny, contact me to find out how!
National Office Week along with Making Office Life gorgeous campaign will provide you with the tools you need to make the difference—you simply have to make the choice.
September — Your power
Make your power gorgeous and you will feel gorgeous and radiate gorgeousness and people will want to be near you. Going to work each day and seeing the same people can be an excuse not to make an effort with your power house and the influence you can have on others.
Unless you take an interest in your power of influence you cannot expect other people to take an interest in you and your career. I hear you say ‘Well I don’t need anyone at work to take an interest in me!’ WRONG!
No one is an island, we work with others and we need to influence them to guide our own growth and development and this needs to be done in a gorgeous powerful way.
Here are some very powerful tools of influence that you can start using today. Practice using them at work to power your way to career success, to create favourable outcomes at meetings and to negotiate your promotional prospects.
The Because Influence simply means that you express whatever it is that you desire and immediately follow it with the word ‘because’ and some reason that may not even be that important. You will dramatically increase your influence and effectiveness.
The Contrast Influence means proposing something outrageous and then offering a more sensible alternative which is what you wanted all along. If your normal holiday entitlement is two weeks and you really need a month to visit relatives in Australia, suggest that you would like to explore the possibility of a nine-month leave of absence or sabbatical. Then pull back to the four-week option which now sounds more acceptable.
The Reciprocal Influence uses emotional debt to get your result. It is a demonstration of the law of giving which states that, when you are given something you will feel bound to return the favour. If someone is against a change that you wish to implement to make your work easier, stay alert to opportunities to help them out with your time or talents [your gift] and soon afterwards, ask for their co-operation in implementing that change [their gift to you]
The Social Proof Influence is a classy name for soliciting testimonials that you can use as proof that others like what you do. Sales and marketing professionals gain testimonials by asking for them or by buying celebrity endorsement in sponsorship deals. Be careful not to ‘go over someone’s head’ but, whenever the opportunity arises, make someone in a position of power aware of an achievement or initiative that you or your team have shone at. Then, when necessary you can work into conversation that this person [the company equivalent of the celebrity] said how well you did.
The Double Bind Influence is where you offer a choice even before the other person has agreed to anything. The classic case is where a salesman opens his order pad and asks ‘would you prefer to pay by cheque or credit card’ although you haven’t even said you are going to buy. You want a meeting with a senior staff member, so ask if next Friday would be convenient or would they prefer Monday morning.
The Consistency Influence applies when you ask a series of unimportant questions that all elicit an obvious ‘yes’ answer. Then, when you ask for whatever it is that you want agreement on, the other party is already preconditioned and influenced to say yes.
The Scarcity Influence uses the fact that a perceived shortage of supply heightens desire. If you want all 12 members of your team to attend a seminar, let it be known that there are only 8 free places and that any others will have to be paid for at £300. When the first 8 are taken you suddenly discover that you have been able to negotiate the final 4 places as long as you get the commitment today.
The Authority Influence is simply pulling rank where, because of your status within the organisation you have the power to say ‘You will do this because I ask you to’. End of argument.
The Credibility Influence means that you use your reputation to get what you want. The easiest way to do this is to become an ‘expert’ in your field by writing a book, a series of articles, appearing on radio or tv, addressing seminars and generally building your professional profile. People will WANT to please you because of your credibility and their desire to associate with your success.
If you really want to change your life you can find out more about these power influencing tools by buying our personal success programme Down Load to Destiny — career programme contact me to find out how!
National Office Week along with Making Office Life gorgeous campaign will provide you with the tools you need to make the difference — you simply have to make the choice.
August — Your fitness
Make your body gorgeous and you will feel gorgeous and radiate gorgeousness and people will want to be near you. Keeping fit is essential to being gorgeous as without the energy and feelings of well being keeping fit will give you the goal of being gorgeous will forever be out of your reach.
Gorgeous Exercise
We all know that exercise is good for us so why is it that a large percentage of the population does little or no exercise? I think there are many factors which influence this, such as the power of TV, excessive workloads, stress, time available and our own personal concept of what constitutes exercise.
Several years ago I was encouraged to do some exercise and was directed towards attending a gym. Now for many people the gym is a great place to combine exercise, personal hygiene (showering etc.) along with their social life and that is a great result. For me however, things were different. I was overweight by 4 stones 7 pounds in relation to my height. The gym was popular with young women and men wearing designer clothes which fitted their slim bodies perfectly.
I am not lacking in self-esteem, yet I often felt conspicuous and certainly not gorgeous. Nevertheless, I continued to attend the gym throughout the winter. However, this particular winter I suffered from many bouts of cold bug, which occasionally became flu and back to cold again. Not a gorgeous feeling in any way shape or form!
I was concerned with this because in the 10 or so years before, I had suffered the usual one or two colds during the winter. One day I was in the gym on an exercise bike. I looked up and saw this burly bloke coughing, sweating profusely and with a runny nose; which he wiped with his hand and placed back on the machine he was using.
I watched him go around the gym blowing his nose into his hand or his small towel, which he also used to wipe the machines with. I discovered the cause of my continuous colds and I left the gym and have never returned. It was the excuse I needed to free me from the chore of attending a gym. I now know that I am not alone in my dislike of gyms.
I immediately replaced the visits to the gym with jogging. I hated jogging at first and now I love it with a passion and feel gorgeous every time I return from the run.
The point I am making is that there is a gorgeous exercise for everyone and it does not have to be joining a gym.
Often when I am coaching a client we will explore all physical activities by making a diverse list, which may include walking, sailing, horse riding, dancing, cycling, swimming, team sports, golf and so on.
Activity
Find a quite space and time and create your own long list of activities you could do — all activities, not just the ones you like and know about.
Now mark each one out of 10. 1 being horrible and 10 gorgeous.
The key is for my client to find one or two activities they enjoy, either from the past or that they would love to try and then to just do it. You will only keep exercising if you enjoy doing it, and feel gorgeous after doing it. So select activities you enjoy doing and commit to doing them regularly and have fun!
Tip
If you are short of time and out of shape consider a simple routine change such as walking up a flight of stairs instead of taking the lift on alternate days of the week. A simple change in routine can be the catalyst to you doing more interesting activities and who knows where that will lead?
If you really want to change your life you can find out more about these power influencing tools by buying our personal success programme Down Load to Destiny — career programme contact me to find out how!
July — Your interview
Make your interview gorgeous, you will feel gorgeous and radiate gorgeousness and people will want to be near you and want to offer you the job. Going to work each day must be a gorgeous experience because we spend an average of 8 hours a day working. So if it is not gorgeous for you — look around and find a job that is!
This month is all about the interview and these tips can be adapted for the internal promotion interview as well as the new company, new job type of interview.
Learn the facts about your prospective employer. Is the company small and family owned or is it part of a bigger group? If so, is that group local, national or international? Is the company within the top 100 of companies in this industry? The top 10? Is it expanding? Is it profitable? What are the prospects for the industry? What can you discover about the company’s ethos, mission and vision? Look for any press mentions or information on the internet. Obtain a copy of the most recent Annual Report.
Who are the movers and shakers in the company? At the very least you must learn the names of the Chairman, Chief Executive, Senior Manager and other key players. You may never need to use this information but it could come in useful if you ever meet them unexpectedly.
Now take out that job advertisement again and, using brief key words, list as many of the factors as you can. Do the same with any job description or ‘person profile’ that you have been sent. Alongside each factor, state in marks out of 10 how closely you and your skills can meet the criteria. This will help you to define your strengths and weaker spots so that, when you attend interview you can really expand on your strengths to leave less time for discussions about any areas where you are weaker.
If your application contains important dates, facts and figures you must ensure that you know these by heart so that you can recall them instantly and without reference to notes. Think of some of the favourite ‘interviewer questions’ and work out possible answers in your mind. Most big bookshops have several titles on ‘interviewing techniques’ so go browsing.
Consider what you will wear for the interview and ensure that all your clothes have enjoyed a recent trip to the dry-cleaner, the shoe repairer or the tailor as appropriate. Fingernails and hair are important influencers during the first few seconds of your interview so take time to have them treated and trimmed as appropriate. Check yourself out in a full-length mirror and make any corrections to dress and posture. Clean teeth, sweet breath and personal hygiene are vitally important and not just on interview days either!
To be your best you must look and feel your best so use these next few days to rehearse being the best that you can.
Then it arrives. The interview invitation. Your preparation must move up a gear.
Check the date and time very carefully and then check it again. Do whatever it takes to arrange your domestic, social and working life to keep the date they suggest. You could set off on the wrong foot and make a most unfavourable impression if you immediately come up with reasons and excuses for needing to change the appointment. If you simply cannot make the date, telephone the company as soon as possible to suggest an alternative and then confirm this immediately by post.
Check the address of the interview location as it may not be where you expect it to be. Then figure out how you will travel there by public transport. If you go by car, where and when are the traffic hotspots on your route and where will you park on arrival? If possible, do a couple of dummy runs to see how long it takes you to get to the venue in time for your interview.
Allow an extra half hour on your journey time. It is better to be one hour early with time to kill in a café than one minute late that can kill your prospects of a successful interview. If you are unavoidably detained, use your mobile phone to let them know, so your preparation must include loading the interviewer’s contact number into your phone.
There is never any way to guess how long an interview might last so ensure that you will be free for as long as it takes. If this means calling in a few favours from friends or relatives to look after children, pets, or spouses until you get home, then do it. No employer wants to hear your excuses for not doing anything during the interview process.
Read all your background information again and find any documents that you may need to take with you. Set these aside in a neat folder. A large brown envelope will do if you cannot get a suitable folder but don’t even think of using a plastic supermarket bag.
Two days before your interview, check everything that you may need. Check it again the next day. Then, on the appointed day, set forth with confidence, determination and a spring in your step knowing that you have made every preparation for a great presentation.
If you really want to change your life you can find out more about these power interview techniques by buying our personal success programme Down Load to Destiny — career programme contact me to find out how!
June — Your appearance
Make your appearance gorgeous and you will feel gorgeous and radiate gorgeousness and people will want to be near you. Going to work each day and seeing the same people can be an excuse not to make an effort with your appearance.
Perhaps you already have a boyfriend or husband and feel that it is not worth the effort to look gorgeous for work because they never see you during the day and you want to keep the ‘gorgeous looks’ for the evenings only. Or perhaps you feel that you are overweight, too skinny, unattractive that you will never be gorgeous. Or the girls in your office are young, slim and gorgeous and you could never compete so you do not bother.
Unless you take an interest in your appearance you cannot expect other people to take an interest. I hear you say ‘Well I don’t need anyone at work to take an interest in me!’ Wrong!
You are wrong on two counts and I will explain.
- The most important thing to know about looking gorgeous is that every time you go to the ladies you will see yourself in the mirror and this will give you an unconscious boost. Which will in turn give you extra energy and a bounce in your step!
- Even though you may never be told, your management will be taking notice of you. They will see you taking a pride in your appearance and deduce from this that you take a pride in all that you do (whether this is true or not it is all about perception). Management translate this into promotional prospects. So looking gorgeous could mean promotion.
How can I appear gorgeous everyday?
You need to decide what looking gorgeous means to you personally as there are as many definitions to this question as there are people working. Makes sense doesn’t it? So spend a little time thinking about what exactly do I mean when I know my appearance is gorgeous?
How can I appear gorgeous at work?
- Smile at your colleagues often; even if you do not feel like it.
- If you need dental work—get it done.
- Have a new modern hair style
- Wear make-up to work if you do not already.
- Change your make-up.
- Join a clothes exchange where you can renew your wardrobe regularly with little expense.
- Shop carefully look for bargains so you can change your appearance regularly.
- Make sure your hands and nails are clean and your nail polish is not chipped.
- Clean your shoes and renew the heals.
- Stand up straight
- Hold your tummy flat
- Be kind and generous with your time and be happy.
Appearing gorgeous at work is an all-round package. Your looks and your attitude combine to produce the gorgeous effect. One without the other can be seen as a sham. Work on both.
If you really want to change your life contact me to find out how!
May — Your emotional health
Make your emotional health gorgeous and you will enjoy going to work each day and you will find that somehow life is easier, people help you more often and promotion becomes effortless.
How do you control your emotional responses at the moment? When you are told that you have done a poor job - do you react aggressively, sullenly, tearfully, resentfully, spitefully, dismissively or do you calmly consider what has been said and if there needs to be improvement do it or ask for help to achieve it?
Unless you control your emotions, your emotions will control you. There are no other options and you must be in control if you are to maintain a healthy emotional balance which will lead to feeling gorgeous. How does this work? Well you can control your feelings and therefore you can feel gorgeous everyday if you want to.
How can I feel gorgeous everyday?
You need to decide what feeling gorgeous means to you personally as there are as many definitions to this question as there are people working. Makes sense doesn’t it? So spend a little time thinking about what exactly does gorgeous mean to me?
Three ways to the gorgeous emotionally controlled life:
- When your negative emotions do not hold you back or restrict your gorgeous feelings in any way.
- When you are fully in control of your emotions and can easily switch to a positive emotional state when you need to. Thus be able to switch to a gorgeous resourceful state.
- When you can express and acknowledge your emotions appropriately according to the circumstances.
Am I emotionally gorgeous?
- When I open my eyes in the morning am I happy just because I am alive?
- Can I list 10 things that happen everyday that I choose to be happy about?
- Do I wish everyone I meet at work with the same enthusiastic ‘Good Morning’?
- When I am given unfavourable feedback do I respond with a ‘Thank you for the feedback’?
- When I hear a colleague criticising the management do I put forward a favourable comment about the management?
- When a team member talks unfavourably behind another team members back do I walk away without comment?
- Do I smile at the receptionist every morning?
- Do I smile and ask the cleaner how he/she is today?
- Do I have a great relationship with the office maintenance staff?
- Do I have a great relationship with the post room staff?
- I make an effort to smile even when I feel angry or sad?
- I never blame another member of staff for anything?
If you answered ‘Yes’ to six or more of the statements in the above questionnaire, congratulations you know you feel gorgeous at work and that you can feel gorgeous whenever you want to, just by choosing to do so. If you answered ‘No’ more times than ‘Yes’ you need to work on these areas because feeling gorgeous inside creates personal success on the outside and your feelings could be affecting your promotional prospects. If you find this hard and really want to change your life contact me to find out how!
National Office Week along with the Making Office Life gorgeous campaign will provide you with the tools you need to make the difference — you simply have to make the choice.
April — Your job/career
Make your career gorgeous and you will enjoy going to work each day. If you enjoy the job you do you will have the career you love and life will be gorgeous. Ask yourself this question:
“Am I happy to get out of bed on a wet Monday morning to go to work?”
The answer needs to be a resounding ‘yes’ for you to know that your job is gorgeous.
What is a gorgeous job?
You need to decide what this means to you personally as there are as many definitions to this question as there are people working. Makes sense doesn’t it? So spend a little time on your self and your career/job to define what it means to you.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself to start your journey to having a gorgeous career.
Is my job/career gorgeous?
- Do I like the people I work with?
- Does my manager provide support for my work?
- Do I like the environment I work in?
- Does my company treat people fairly and ethically including me?
- Do I have a control and a direct impact on most of the decisions affecting my work or freedom of choice?
- Do the hours I work suit me?
- I am comfortable communicating with my colleagues and managers?
- Does my manager respect my work and appreciate me?
- Do I love the type of job I perform?
- Am I in the right career for me?
- Are my talents fully utilised in my job?
If you answered no to six or more of the statements in the above questionnaire, it could be possible your job/career has a degree of uneasiness which will prevent you feeling gorgeous at work. Causes of uneasiness can be varied and include the influence or impact of the any of the following:
- Erratic changes in management
- Unsuitable hours
- Salary incorrect
- Poor work environment
- Negative company culture
- Too much travel
- Poor management
- Skills mismatch
- Personality mismatch
- Poor company communications
- Workload increased
- Glass ceilings
- Your values not in line with companies
- Burn-out
- Unfulfilled potential
Now you have looked at your job/career you can make the changes necessary to enhance your current role or to find the perfect role. If you need help with this you can contact me to arrange for a coach to work with you on redefining your potential and finding the gorgeous job. Remember that to have a gorgeous job you need to feel gorgeous when you get out of bed on a wet Monday morning!
March — Your finances
Make your finances gorgeous and you will enjoy going to work each day. Most people think that because they are earning money and money is coming in, that their financial situation will be ok. Others think that so long as the debt is on a credit card and they pay the minimum each month life is ok and others completely ignore the financial side of life until it is way too late and the bailiffs are at the door. Do you have a gorgeous financial situation with enough money to pay and play?
What is a gorgeous financial situation?
Well a minimum gorgeous financial situation is one where you have sufficient income to cover your outgoings and also have some money over to save for a rainy day. Income enough so you do not need to worry if an unexpected bill arrives because you have funds to cover this.
A really gorgeous financial situation is one where you not only have sufficient income to cover expenditures and luxuries you can also purchase ISA’s each year and save tax at the same time.
So if you have your finances under control you have a gorgeous financial life. If, on the other hand, you do not know the details of your expenditure per month you are damaging your gorgeous life. I hear you say ‘But it’s boring and I am in debt anyway so why care?’
There are two things in that sentence you need to be aware of, the first is that finances are boring and the second that your debt is not worth sorting out.
How to make finances gorgeous and not boring? Well there are two easy ways to do this and having a dream-goal whilst making your money planning a gorgeous experience. Imagine what it would be like to be able to buy luxuries without the little nagging feeling that you really should not be doing this as you cannot afford it.
Dream-goal — go ahead and really imagine you have the money in cash and can afford the luxury holiday (or what you want). Imagine how gorgeous it will feel, how enjoyable it is to buy what you want knowing you have the money already sitting in the bank to pay for it. Really experience this in full Technicolor and as a movie with you as the star, feeling gorgeously happy because you have your finances under control.
Now you need to do the financial investigation. Decide on a quiet time to do this. Turn off the phone and lock the door. Put your favourite music on in the background, make yourself a gorgeous non-alcoholic drink, you are ready. If you prefer to do it all at one time — go ahead. For some of you this will not be a good idea and the best way forward is to break down your expenditure into areas and work on one area at a time until the job is done!
Here are some money saving tips to start your journey to gorgeous finances.
- If your debt is unmanageable go and get professional unbiased advice from an independent financial advisor.
- Avoid impulse buying by not going to the shops or your favourite shop-website.
- Replace impulse buying with other activities like a walk with friends or some other pleasurable activity. The key is activity.
- If you do need an item use online price comparison sites to make sure you get the best value for your money or Bang for your Buck!
- Pay off your credit card debts quickly as you are paying really high interest on the money.
- Pay off more than the minimum payment required on your credit cards.
- Take out the amount of money you can afford to spend at the beginning of the week and only spend that. Once gone its gone!
- Make your lunch instead of buying it each day.
- If you find number 8 difficult; make your lunch every other day and at least you will be taking some action towards gorgeous goals.
- Replace the coffee you buy from the fashionable coffee shops with water or fruit juice as it will be much healthier and it will make your skin and your expenditure gorgeous.
- Instead of buying that magazine or newspaper take a library book instead.
- Join up with a colleague or two and each one buy a different magazine and share them.
Remember that to have gorgeous finances you need to have an income that is greater than your expenditure which will allow for that gorgeous luxury and leave you happy and debt free!
February — Your Office Relationships
Make your working relationships gorgeous and you will enjoy going to work each day. Most people think that they do not have to work on their relationships and this can be based on the fact that we learnt our relationship etiquette largely by trial and error when we were children. We discovered what worked for us and repeated the process and we learnt what did not work and avoided those actions. So how come work relationships can be so tricky?
What is a happy working relationship?
Well generally speaking a happy working relationship is one where both people have respect for each other and behave in a professionally appropriate way, when in each others company, both in and out of work. Notice it does not mention the word friend as this is not applicable here.
There are numerous reasons for working relationship breakdown, far too many to consider in this article. Therefore I am going to concentrate on some of the rules to good relationship building and offer you some ways of creating gorgeous work relationships.
Before you start you need to read, understand and believe the following statement:
“It is easy and achievable to change your own attitudes and behaviours than it ever is to change the attitudes and behaviours of your co-workers.”
You know that this statement is true. You may be lucky enough to influence another person once in a while but the most effective and long term relationship building, starts and ends with you!
You need to decide that you want to have gorgeous work relationships and having decided you do, select one of the things from the list below, that you will do every day for all of this month. Remember we are working towards the gorgeous you and you are adding to the health action you selected from last months list.
- Respect the other person — no matter what has gone on before, look for a skill or talent that the other person has and compliment them on it.
- Avoid conflict — even if you are in the right and the other person is absolutely in the wrong, avoid conflict by stating your understanding of the situation in a calm and quietly controlled manner. Tip: speak slowly and in a quiet controlled tone.
- Always remember that a good working relationship is very important to you. You have a vested interest in making all your work relationships work as you are being judged on them. Never take sides or talk behind someone’s back as you are also being judged when you do. Be even handed, avoid gossip and never say anything about anyone that would embarrass either of you if the other party ever overheard your comments.
- Listen and hear — you need to really listen to the other person and stop your inner voice (which says things like ‘I know’, ‘That’s rubbish!’ etc.) as it sabotages working relationships. Take time to really listen.
- Ask questions — the more you know about a person the better able you are to understand and build on your relationships. Find out what is important to them.
- Put aside your prejudices — yes you will have some and yes they will badly affect your relationship building abilities. What do I mean? Example: Are you ageist? Is the other person, too young to understand or too old to be worth the effort? If you have any judgemental approaches to relationships; they will fail.
- Avoid blame — this can be a tough one when you are getting the flack for someone else. Simply state what your part in the situation was and then be quiet! There is no need to point the finger and it will not reflect well on you; as no one likes a snitch.
- Help someone — go out of your way to do a task for the person you have most difficulty in working with and do it for no reward. That means you do it without telling anyone.
- Social events — Take great care at any social gathering of work colleagues as this can be a mine field and many careers have been crushed by inappropriate behaviours at these events. Tips: Do not drink alcohol at the event, do not flirt, do not make a fool of yourself or others. Remember respect others.
- Bad boss — you need to decide how important this job is to you because if it is part of your long term career path you will need to make all the efforts to ensure your relationship with your boss is professional and workable. Remember you are responsible for how you behave and how you feel about things.
- Control your un-resourceful emotions — keep your feelings under control. It is never acceptable to lose your temper at work, nor is it professional to burst into tears.
- Take interpersonal skills courses — go on any courses offered to you which will give you skills to advance your interactions with co-workers including, influencing skills, negotiation skills, anger management etc. You know the areas you need improvement.
Remember that to have gorgeous working relationships you must have respect for yourself and for your co-workers and an easy mantra to live a gorgeous life by is, ‘treat your co-workers (no matter whom) as you would wish to be treated’ Keep this fundamental rule and your relationships will be gorgeously easy and happy!
January — Your Health
Take care of your health and improve your gorgeous life. Each year one in three people will be affected by cancer (UK); about 100,000 people in the UK have their first stroke, and heart failure affects around 900,000 people (UK). The other notable fact is that the age at which people are being diagnosed is reducing, ever more people in their 30’s are in these groups.
What does good health mean to you?
I realise this seems a strange thing to ask you to consider. The reason I ask is because we are all at different levels of health and for some of us good health would just mean being able to walk up the office steps without getting out of breath. For others it means being full of energy. You need to determine your own definition of health before you will know if you have it or not. Spend some time thinking about the answer as it will help you decide which activity to start with this month. In line with your own definition of good health, where are you now? How gorgeous is your heath?
There are several factors which contribute to the general meaning and feeling of good health and these would normally include good mental health. In this month we are going to focus on the physical side of good health.
Having decided what good health is for you and where you are in relation to it, select one of the things from the list below, that you will do every day for all of this month. Remember we are working towards the gorgeous you.
- Take more exercise at work — walk the stars instead of taking the lift or get off the bus/train a station earlier and walk from there. Park three streets away from the office and walk from the car.
- Eat for energy — eat plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables for lunch. Select one of the delicious offers from the M&S lunchtogo range.
- Drink more water — drink plenty of water, at least 1–2 litres every day. Buy a beautiful glass bottle and drinking glass, fill the bottle with water and sip water regularly during the day.
- Reduce caffeine — restrict yourself to 2 cups of coffee or tea a day.
- Reduce sugary drinks — replace every other sugary drink with a glass of water and if possible do not drink any sugary drinks.
- Reduce alcohol units a week — know exactly how many units you drink and reduce it by 50%.
- Eat fish or take fatty oil supplements (if you are not on any medication).
- Take time for you — meditate, spend quiet time alone, have a lavender scented bath surrounded with candles (no music).
- Join a club — swimming, dancing, fitness, gym, horse riding, sailing etc., any club where you have to take exercise and have fun at the same time.
- Eat a piece of fruit if you’re craving something sweet.
- Eat whole, unrefined grain products instead of the processed versions.
- Eat one long-lasting sugar free boiled sweet — when all else fails!
There is nothing stopping you from selecting more than one action or from starting one action this week and adding in another one next week. This will speed up the process. National Office Week along with Making Office Life gorgeous campaign will provide you with the tools you need to make the difference — you simply have to make the choice.
Best-selling author of the Handbook Series, life coach and keynote speaker, Curly Martin has helped more than 1 million people become passionate about their life. In her latest book The Personal Success Handbook, she shows you how to have success on your terms and live a juicy passionate life. Find out more or call free phone 0800 1910200 now.
© Curly Martin
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